Tuesday, February 18, 2014

If "Breaking Bad" Was Set in Singapore

"I said Katong laksa."

1) Instead of cooking meth amphetamines, Walter White would be cooking pork dumplings.

2) Instead of using Pollos Hermanos as a front, the drug cartel would be using Din Tai Fung.

3) Instead of Albuquerque, New Mexico, the plot would unfold in Woodlands.

4) There would be way more taxis and construction work going on.

5) Instead of rehab, Jessie Pinkman would have gone on a farm stay in Perth.

6) You wouldn't need to deal drugs to break the law, carrying a durian on a bus would suffice.

7) Instead of a drug lord, crazy gun-wielding Tuco Salamanca would be a landlord. One refusing to return your deposit.

8) Most of what Jessie Pinkman says would be censored.

9) Instead of: "Yo!" Jessie would be saying: "Aiyoh!"

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Monday, February 10, 2014

This Is Naples

                                                                                         (photo Mario Gargiulo)

Years ago, I found myself alone, broken hearted, and hungry in Naples. I was staying at my parent's empty house in the middle of the summer and there was nothing to eat. I went around the corner to buy some tomatoes from a grocer. He asked me what I was intending to make for lunch. A fresh tomato salad? "It's the day before Ferragosto, all stores are closed. You'll never find any bread."  I mumbled something under my breath as I slowly walked away with my tomatoes.  I was his last customer and after I paid, he lowered the heavy saracinesca of the shop. Then he called me back: "Signorina! Wait here." Then, he went upstairs to where he lived with his family and brought me back two slices of casareccio bread in a napkin. "You can't eat a tomato salad without bread."
This is Naples.

Anni fa, mi trovai sola, sconsolata, e affamata a Napoli. Mi trovavo nella casa vuota dei miei genitori durante l'estate e non c'era niente da mangiare. Uscita di casa, sono andata alla fine della via per comprare dei pomodori dal fruttivendolo. Voleva sapere cosa intendevo cucinare. Un'insalata di pomodori? "Ma e' Ferragosto, tutti i negozi sono chiusi. Non trovera' pane." Mormorai qualcosa mentre lentamente andavo via con i miei pomodori. Ero l'ultima sua cliente, quindi abbasso' la pesante saracinesca del negozio, e mi disse: "Signorina! Aspetti qui." Poi, sali' le scale dove viveva con la sua famiglia e mi riporto' due fette di pane casareccio in un tovagliolo. "Non si puo' mica mangiare un'insalata di pomodori senza pane."
Questa e' Napoli.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Monday, February 3, 2014

Science Camp-Day 1

"Science is fun when you understand words."

"Mommy, did you know our tongues are covered with thousands of taste bugs?"
I am pretty sure your teacher meant taste buds, Eliot. (But, thanks for the image.)